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Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Time to be Happy

I think it’s a sad comment on the sign of our times the many people who tell me they are so busy these days they don’t have a minute to think! At one time that statement would have been taken with a pinch of salt, easily recognisable as an overstatement: “Oh, come on, you’re going too far, it’s not that bad.” But now it seems to be more and more a statement of fact, taken literally without so much as the blink of an eye.

So where has the time gone?

Why does life seem to flash by at warp speed? Or is it just me? It has become the norm to dash down the escalators to catch the incoming tube train as if it is the only one available. In fact we are so busy we don’t give ourselves a minute to think about what it means to be happy, content, satisfied.

It sounds almost like a foreign language to some:“I’m too busy working to pay the bills, to make ends meet, to try and get ahead” is the more common lament, as if our happiness lies in the future AFTER we have done all of this ‘struggle and strife’ thing.

Many of us are caught on the treadmill of paying off our debts, the mortgage, the student loan, the car, the furniture... So we could be forgiven for thinking that happiness is a luxury and only for the future, maybe when we retire.

The trouble with this kind of thinking, however is that we attract into our lives more of what we are focusing upon. Our happiness doesn’t lie out there somewhere at another place and time, waiting for us to arrive. It is here, now, in the ever present, waiting for us to claim it.

It is only a decision away. We can CHOOSE to be happy. Happiness is our natural state. In fact by just getting out of our own way we can become happy no matter what our present circumstances. The secret seems to lie in first BEING what you desire.

We have learnt to think ‘struggle’ over the years and this becomes our reality, when in fact reality is relative and depends on a thought or a decision to act a certain way.

Did you know that we are free to choose our thoughts? Imagine getting the house of your dreams. Imagine how that feels. Everything just as you like it, down to the décor, the swimming pool, the magnificent gardens ……

What did you feel?

Maybe you felt resistance, experienced as a rigidity or tightness in the body and usually connected with negative thoughts, “What’s the point, it’s never going to happen anyway” …

On the other hand if you are anything like me you would be feeling uplifted, happy, relaxed, maybe excited. Your body relaxes and expands.

Let me ask you something: is it the house that has made you happy or your imagination?

Do you, in fact need the house to make you happy? Some people get the house and still don’t feel happy. The funny thing is, if you continue to be happy at the THOUGHT of being in possession of this house you are much more likely to attract into your life more things to be happy about. More than if you keep on trudging along on the ‘never-ending’ treadmill of lack, need and denial.

Ultimately it is your choice. There is more than enough to go round and you only need to tap into it. You are free to live happily right now, in this moment because thoughts are just thoughts and you can change them, change your focus, your attitude, how you respond. Imagine, for example, choosing to be be grateful that you have some money in your hand to pay this bill or that, instead of thinking ‘where am I going to get the money for the next one?’ If you make a deliberate choice to practise the attitude of gratitude then don’t be surprised if you find more things turning up in your life to be grateful for!

The secret to a happy life is to remember that all of our thoughts are just thoughts. What we want ultimately is to be happy. So why not start there? Open into being happy from the inside out. Be grateful for all the good things that you already have.

Laugh for no reason. What? Yes, laugh, whether it is artificial to begin with or genuine, laughter acts as a natural stress reliever and makes you feel good. Take the serious things in life and look at them with a sense of humour and fun. Let go of resistance and learn to connect with a playful attitude, your more spontaneous and delightful inner child, who you were before you learned how to be negative and judgemental, before you learned fixed ways of responding to the world. Be present to life, open up again to your flexibility and sense of adventure and allow life to touch you in new and deeply enriching ways.

When was the last time you stopped to smell the roses?

All in all it is about moving from busy and mostly negative thoughts of the mind to living from an abundant and open heart. Your choice.

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